TWITTER DEE TWITTER DUMB

Hi folks, I’m Hattie Collier and I’d like to say that I’ve got a bone to pick.  Actually, I’m hopping mad and I’ve got to calm down just to write about this. 

You see, the other day my twelve year old granddaughter came to my house, and as usual I was almost  glad to see her, and I say almost because lately when she comes over, all she does is sit on my couch and  constantly twitters or tweets—or whatever they call it.  I’ve noticed that conversation between us has become very limited the older she gets.  I’m surprised she can put a complete sentence together when she does speak, so on this particular day I decided to try and see if she could still talk.

I asked her what she wanted to be when she grew up.  It’s a question that I’ve asked her many times in the past and the answers have gone the gamut from a princess to a teacher.  She was nine the last time I asked and she said that she wanted to be an astronaut.  Was I proud!

This time she looked up at me with her thumbs steadily moving over her cell phone and said just as plain as day, “I plan on being a reality star on TV because I want to get paid.”  Say what?

I kept my cool and asked smugly, “And what courses will you take in college to prepare you for that career?”

Still tweeting, she didn’t even look up when she answered, “Oh, I’m not going to college.  I’m gonna make a sex tape when I’m eighteen, put it on YouTube and get discovered that way.”

I would have laughed out loud if she hadn’t looked serious.  All I could think of was, Lord, have mercy, where did we go wrong?  I kept telling myself that she was only twelve, so she’d change her mind ten times before she reached eighteen, so don’t despair.  But I whispered a silent prayer for some backup and then I asked, “Have you told your folks about your big plans?”

“Nope,” she answered with her thumbs continuing to fly, “I’m just sharing it with you.  They’ll find out when I turn eighteen.  So please don’t tell them.”

Now I was supposed to be a co-conspirator with my granddaughter about her plans to become a porn star!  Lucky me!

I had to drop on my knees that night and pray over that one.  I didn’t want to betray her trust, but I decided that if I saw any signs that this was truly her ambition and not some childhood fantasy, I was running like the wind to my daughter and son-in-law and squeal like a pig. You see, that’s one of the advantages of being a grandparent, you can dump the problems that the grandkids might have right into their parents’ laps.

After getting over the shock of having a potential nudie model in the family, I decided that I had to get a clue as to where the child’s head was at.  What was it about her generation that made public nudity and sexual activity an acceptable stepping stone to stardom, and on a so called reality show at that!

I headed to the library in search of a book that might explain to me what was going on in this country that outside forces would influence my kindhearted grandchild more than her descent, loving, and God-fearing family.

I’m not sure that I got the answer, but I’m sure did get a clue.  Remembering how my granddaughter never missed a beat twittering during our rare five minute conversation, I picked up a book titled Bloggerati, Twitterait:  How Blogs and Twitter are Transforming Popular Culture. The book was written by Mary Cross.

What I read boggled my mind.  I knew that things in this country were changing. That always happens, but as I continued reading it dawned on me that I was living through a full-fledged revolution; nothing would ever be the same again.

There was too much in the book to review here, but among the many things that I found to be really interesting were the predictions that Eric Schmidt, the former CEO of Google, made in 2009.

These are some of his predictions about what the internet would look like in 5 years (that’s by 2014):

“Today’s teenagers are the model of how the Web will work in five years—they jump from app to app to app seamlessly.”  I know that’s true.  I’ve been a witness to that!

“It’s because of this fundamental shift toward user-generated information that people will listen more to other people than to traditional sources.”  If “traditional sources” include family members he’s right on track with that.

OTHER PREDICTIONS INCLUDE:

“American popular culture is going worldwide and viral on the Internet.”  Who can argue with that?

 “People will be more knowledgeable, though not necessarily wiser.”  Truer words were never spoken.  The just plain stupid decision making quota has reached an all time high.

“But there will be a proliferation of bad information, rumor and falsehoods.”  As if there’s not enough of that now!

“The power structure will change, breaking the grip of established institutions on culture and giving more power to the ordinary person.”  More power to dumber people.  Oh Lord!

 “Privacy on the Internet is essentially over.”  As if I need more people in my business. I’m just thrilled by that!

 “More people will work at home.”  Good, now my daughter and son-in-law can watch their kids more often.  I’ve got things to do!

“Women will dominate social networks.”  Thank goodness, all we need is more porno watching men on the internet. 

“Smarter kids, harder to educate.”  Translated:  Smarter kids will be dumber.  

“An increasingly isolated individual within the nuclear family.”  

So that’s the bottom line.  I see this last prediction happening with my four grandchildren every day, and I’m in the battle of a life time to try to stem the tide.  But, somebody tell me how can a mere mortal fight a tsunami?  Progress is not always improvement.

We can all muse on that.

WHAT PEOPLE SAY AND WHAT THEY REALLY MEAN

Hello, this is Connie Palmer writing on the blog this week, and I’ve been giving some thought about how difficult it is for most of us to say what we really mean.  How many times have we heard the words “honesty is the best policy”?  Too many as far as I’m concerned, especially when I know that lies seem to be more common than truth for too many people. It’s especially rampant among politicians.  I’m beginning to think that lying is second nature for them they tell so many of them.  It would be nice if people say what they really mean.  Believe me, the world would be a much better place.

For instance, when politicians say that these are times of economic uncertainty, what they really mean is that your ass is grass! You ain’t got no money.  You ain’t gonna get no money, and the government ain’t gonna print no more money so you can get some. Too bad for you! I’ve got mine and I’m happy. 

That lie is almost as bad as when they say “I’m not a Washington insider”.  What they really mean and what they leave out is the word yet, because as soon as they get the opportunity to meet whoever can make them an insider it’s status quo time. Power and influence are addictive and I’m not aware of many rebels in Washington. I might be wrong, but I don’t think that there are many politicians who leave office with less money than they had when they won office. 

But I’m not going to beat up on politicians. They’re just easy targets because they lie so much about everything.  There are so many things that people say, but don’t mean that I can’t name them all, so I picked a few of my other favorites.         

When you bump into someone that you haven’t seen for some time and they call you Sweetie, Honey or Dear during the conversation, what they really mean is “I couldn’t remember your name if somebody paid me,” or “either I’ve got to cut this short and make my escape or keep talking until you give me a clue to what the hell your name is.”  I know this one is true because I’m guilty. 

Another one is when some parents say that their child is precocious. What they really mean is watch out for the brat and I’m keeping the kid’s hair long so the horns don’t show. 

This one is for those of you who are grandparents. When your children bring the grandchildren over to your house and they say:  “Could you watch the kids for a little while.  I’ve got to run to the (fill in the blank).”  What they really mean is “You’ll be babysitting for me for the next 4, (6,8,10,18 or maybe 24) hours and if you think that you’re going to see me before then you’ve got another think coming!” I learned this one the hard way, so grandparents beware! Let them call you in advance, tell you exactly what they need, and if you give them the okay also give them a deadline.  If the car doesn’t pull up by the deadline, that’s it.  Next time tell them to find another babysitter.  You’ve got your own life to live.

You know, one thing that I enjoy about growing older is having attained peace of mind. Things that were so important when I was younger have become less so now.  I don’t tolerate lies or liars anymore. I demand the truth and I try to be truthful.  Oh, there are times when I’ll backslide so that I won’t hurt someone’s feelings. After all how can I tell a mother that her baby is ugly?  So I’ll describe it as sweet, or precious when what I really mean is that I hope the kid grows up to be smart, because becoming attractive will remain an unattainable goal.   

It would be nice if we could all say what we mean more often.  I think that the truth can hurt much less than a lie. I’m just saying what I really mean, so you can muse on that.

BRAIN FART: I WAS "THE HELP"

Hello, folks, this is Miss Fanny here with another Brain Fart, and since a little time has passed since the release of that movie “The Help”, I thought that I’d throw in my two cents worth like everybody else I’ve been talking to.  My daughter-in-law, Hattie, talked me into going to the movie theatre to see it. I hadn’t been to a movie for so long I couldn’t remember the last time.  Who wants to see triple sequels and double prequels?  And forget 3-D.  Why should I pay extra money for some glasses that I can’t wear once I leave the theater?  Not to mention that I don’t want those monsters and bugs and other crazy things leaping off the screen at me.  It might be fun for some 4 year old preschooler, but I’m a full grown woman!

Anyway, I saw the movie and the first thing I’ve got to say is that the acting was great! I really enjoyed it.  As for the story line, I’ve been there done that.  Before I moved north I was the help.  Lord knows that the work conditions weren’t a picnic, but thank goodness that it wasn’t as bad as the ones in the movie.  Even as fiction that was a mess!

When I was the help, I worked six days a week, but I lived in and I had my own bedroom and bathroom.  I can’t say if my employer would have let me use her bathroom or not, but I do know that bathrooms were segregated everywhere else in the city, so who knows. The couple I worked for was typical for its day.  He was a big executive in a tobacco company and she was a socialite housewife.  Like the women in the movie, the one I worked for never did a lick of work.  I did it all, and I did it well.  I took pride in my work and I kept the house spotless and cooked meals that would melt in your mouth. 

The lady of the house more or less ignored me except to give orders, but every once in the while she’d have some sort of spell and ask me some questions about myself.  Since I wasn’t trying to be her friend, I usually answered in one syllable words, which translated into leave me the hell alone. She wasn’t slow. She got the picture, so much so that I was more or less invisible in the house. You wouldn’t believe the things I found out about her and her husband. I could write a book. 

I took care of their two kids from the time that they were a couple of months to the ages of 7 and 9.  They were pretty good kids.  I taught them to say please and thank you, yes ma’am and yes sir.  They caught on pretty quick and they really weren’t much trouble.  Did I love them or their parents?  I really can’t say that I did.  I liked them okay. They were nice enough for the times and under the circumstances, but it was the south.  The family was into segregation and keeping my people down. I was into doing the job that I had been hired to do, and saving enough money to get the hell out of dodge.  Loving my employers or their off spring wasn’t in the plan. 

I worked for the family for ten years, and until this day I don’t think that anybody in that household remembered my last name. That was okay with me. The pay was low, but they paid me in cash every week and that’s all I cared about, getting my money. So in my case the love affair between the help and her employees didn’t exist, at least on my part. I saved that money until I was able to buy a one way ticket north, then I kissed my Mama and Papa goodbye, hopped on a train and never looked back.  I guess the family I worked for missed me when I didn’t come in that morning and then maybe not.  I don’t know and I don’t care. 

I guess you’ll say that I was the other side of the help, not the touchy, feely, cuddly kind, but the kind that saw working in the household of others as a step toward getting me what I wanted.

There weren’t many opportunities back then, but a lot of daydreams and I’ll tell you something. I was never ashamed of being a maid.  It was good, honest work. It allowed me to help my folks when they needed it and in some cases the wages of many maids have paid for houses, cars, furniture and college educations for their children. No!  Being a maid was nothing to be ashamed of, unlike being one of those multi-millionaires who cheats people out of their life savings.  Given the choice of the two, I’d rather be the help.   

Now muse on that! 

DO YOU NEED A MAN TO SERVICE YOU?

Hi again.  It’s Bea Bell here asking you a question.  Do you remember the Texaco Service Man?  You know, the service station attendant that would come out to put gas in your car, check the oil, and wipe your windshield?  For those of you who don’t remember this, once upon a time there was such service.  I remember that service man, and I miss him.

What I actually mourn is the death of customer service.  In the gasoline business of today self-service translates to no service. The death of the notion that customers should be treated with some respect is rampant.  If customers are dissatisfied with the service they receive, who cares?  The motto—“the customer is always right”—is true only if you can shout loud enough, complain long enough and write a letter to the right person. 

How much does rude customer service bother me?  Let me count the ways.  

Have you ever gone on line for a product or service, but can’t quite maneuver around the web site?  There is usually an email address to contact the company and I admit that most sites are quick to respond. However, by the time that some of the companies do answer you’ve gotten someone else to figure out the problem, or you just don’t care anymore.  Now the object of having an on-line computer business is to have it on line—I get it.   But if you can’t get around the website because it is poorly designed or you are computer illiterate, you need to talk to a human being.  If you work really hard and want to spend hours searching the web site, you may eventually find a telephone number. There are some cases, however, where it will take hiring a private detective to get a phone number.

Whenever I call a business, I make sure I have the entire day to make the call because in all likelihood I’ll end up in telephone hell.  You know what I mean. It goes like this:

“Thank you for calling (insert any company name).   Please listen carefully because our menu options have changed.   (Like it makes any difference; you won’t get to talk to anybody no matter what option you pick).  

After fooling around for 15 minutes trying to pick an option because none of them are what I really want, I call back because I figure maybe I didn’t hear my option.  Here is where they trick you. They don’t give you an option to talk to a live person.   But, I figured it out one day when in my frustration I shouted “OPERATOR!”  Now here is where telephone hell really gets hot.  The robot voice says that it is transferring your call, and you are put on hold for an eternity only to have the robot eventually disconnect you!

For a long time this type of treatment really ticked me off, but no more. I’ve learned to play by their Rules To Make Customers Suffer.  I now have snacks, sandwiches, drinks and the television remote on hand. When I hear the robot say, “Please stay on the line, your call is very important to us” I laugh hysterically.  I know they don’t mean it, but I can wait them out—for hours if I have to.

Another situation that pisses me off is walking into a store and making a complete tour of the place before I can find a salesperson.  Here’s another blast from the past:  once upon a time sales people, actually knew something about the product their customers wanted to buy. Not now! When I finally find what I want—with no help from the salesperson—and head to the cashier counter, I only pray there is not a power outage and the computer goes dead because these days no one knows how to count.  I was in a store when the computerized cash register died and the clerk could not count my change!  She looked in horror at the dysfunctional register, frantically punching the register buttons with one hand and clutching my money in the other one, but it was her lucky day.  Before I could say anything, a little ten-year-old girl standing nearby with her mother quietly stated the correct amount that the cashier should give me.

Change doesn’t always mean progress. Right now, as I curl up on my sofa preparing to make a call to yet another business, I’m thinking about the Texaco man with his pearly white smile, broad shoulders and ever- ready squeegee. I can’t help but sigh. I miss the man. He really knew how to service a girl.

Click below to see exactly what I’m talking about, and then muse on it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G3b9jxp1Evc

A SEVEN STEP GUIDE TO SHORT-TERM SAVINGS

Hi, I’m Elizabeth Parker and I’m a guest blogger this week.  My friends at Grandmother, Incorporated have asked me to write this blog about how to effectively handle money.  You see, I’ve always been a financially responsible person who could think of ways to stretch my money, and that has led me to three careers dealing in finances over a 30 year span.

The first career was as a teller at a Savings & Loan.  That is when I decided that I loved dealing with other peoples’ finances, so I earned a Bachelors' degree in Business Administration with a minor in Finances and Economics.

The second career was as a Manager/Loan Office/Discount Broker at several commercial banks.  My third career has been that of an author.  I wrote a book titled Financial Health in the Spirit.  My book is designed for the average, everyday person with no formal financial training, to learn how to manage their finances and I would like to offer a few suggestions on you can start saving. 

1. Start Small

You can begin by saving as little as $5.00 a pay period.  That’s the equivalent of saving for the price of a six-pack or the price of a pack of cigarettes.  Saving $5.00 every week is only $20.00 a month.  If you save that amount for 12 months that means that you have saved $240.00 a year.  Starting small is better than not doing anything except wringing your hands

2. Give up something to reach a financial goal

If you think tht saving $5.00 a week is too small of an amount, then up the ante by saving the price of eating out, or the price of a pair of shoes or the price of a movie ticket.  Based on your life style, determine what you are willing to delay having for another time and put that amount aside to save. 

3.  Put the funds in a lock box or an envelope until you save enough to open an account

Most banks or credit unions will open an account with a $100.00.  Do a little research and find out which financial institution has the best deal concerning a savings account.  Opening a savings account is best because there are withdrawal restrictions on savings accounts.  These restrictions can help keep you on track.    

 4.  After you put the money in the bank forget what you have in your savings account, but don’t forget about adding money to it regularly           

To avoid running to the bank every week continue your savings at home until you have $50 and then make a deposit at the bank.  The fewer times  that you go to the bank the less you will think about that money and want to spend it. 

 5.  Keep a log/record of your money

The bank gives you a monthly statement but an additional record helps you see how often you are setting aside funds and how much.  You will not need to count the money every time you put money in you envelope. Also, maintaining the date and amounts in your record gives you a check and balance when your statement comes.  Save your deposit receipts.  They should become a part of your personal records.  Remember that banks can make mistakes too.  

6.  Set a goal as to how you plan to use the money

Example:  In 3 months I need $100.00 to pay my car insurance.

If you have been putting aside $20.00 a month for 3 months, you will have saved $60.00 toward that bill.  Then you will only need to use $40.00 from you current paycheck to pay that car insurance.  Short term savings is another way of preparing for future events.   

7.  Write your goal down, so if you are tempted to dip into it you will remember the purpose of the savings.  Start today.  You won't be sorry.

These are just a few of the suggestions that I would like to make to those of you who haven’t been in the habit of saving.  You’re well worth paying yourself something after all your hard work.  Visit my website www.fhinthespirit to learn a bit more about how you can effectively handle your finances. 

 

TOLERATING FOOLS

Hi, this is Connie writing on the blog this week, and I’m here to tell you that I don’t suffer fools lightly and I’m just about fed up messing with them.  I know that I’m not perfect, but my goodness, there are some things that people do that are just plain stupid.  If I was to come up with a list of them it would be much too long, so I’ll name a few of my pet peeves to save time and space.  Mind you they’re not in any special order; I hate all of the stupidity equally.

 First on the list are the people who did not vote in the November 2010 election, and who are now complaining about the situation in the United States Congress and the Tea Party insanity.  When one of these fools steps to me to discuss either of these issues, I ask one question.  Did you vote in the mid-term election?  If the answer is no, the conversation is over. I walk away.  If they don’t like it, I really don’t care. As far as I’m concerned if you don’t vote you don’t have a voice, so don’t complain to me. I figure that when the mess hits the fan the nonvoters get what they deserve.  Is that taking a hard line?  Yes, it is.  Next!

 People who talk down to their elders need to be put in their place. When my mother was alive I can’t tell you how many times people talked around her.  They would be referring to her, but talking to me as if she wasn’t right in front of them. This was especially pervasive among medical personnel.  I could understand if she had been senile or suffered from Alzheimer disease, but although she was older, she was as sharp as a tack. Yet the expectation seemed to be that because of her age she was some sort of dimwit who couldn’t take care of her own business.   When you live in a country that has a population that is as frightened of aging as the people in these United States, you get that kind of thinking.  Respecting each person as being unique is not in the picture, and sometimes that lesson has to be taught the hard way.

When my mother was in her eighties, I drove her to the doctor for her appointment.  He was a man in his late thirties or early forties who she had been going to for about two years.  I had never gone into his office with her because she usually drove herself there, but this time I accompanied her and she asked me to go into his office with her. I guess that was his cue that Momma’s mind had deteriorated, so he asked me: “How is she today?  What can I do for her?” 

 I was so taken aback by his asking me that I was rendered speechless, but my mother knew exactly what to say.  She took that man’s chin between her fingers, just like you do with a child, so that she had his full attention.  She looked him straight in the eyes and told him calmly,   “Doctor, I don’t know what your problem is, but you have been talking down to me since I started coming to you.  I brought my daughter in here so that she could witness how you treat me, but I want you to know that until you correct your attitude, you can kiss my ass!”  With that we left his office never to return again.  Folks need to understand that every person who has aged does not have diminished capacity, and believe me the spirit can be fully intact.    

 The third fools that I can’t tolerate are those who text while driving. What in the hell?  Has all sanity left the planet?  Why would anybody write a note while they are driving two to three tons of steel?  Half of the people on the street can’t drive anyway, and now the rest of the bad drivers are texting and talking on their cell phones!  Will the insanity never stop?  When I see these idiots it makes me want to attach one of those scoops that they have on the front of bulldozers onto my car and start cleaning house. Every time I spot a texting while driving violation I’d scoop the car up, driver and passengers and toss them in the nearest ditch.  Good riddance.

 Oh, and there are some other fools who I need to address.   Those are the ones who call women who date younger men cougars.  As if we’re some animals.  Yes, I date a younger man and I don’t appreciate the depiction.  It sounds as though we’re going to spring on some unsuspecting younger man and gobble him up.  Give me a break!  It’s time to take into account the unlimited number of men who date and marry girls young enough to be their daughters.  As a matter of fact I’ve read that actor, Michael Douglas, is older than his wife, Catherine Zeta Jones’ parents. I’m sure that can be said for a whole lot of men in that situation.  So since I’m classified as a cougar, I’ll take it upon myself to classify the men who are with younger women.  I think that I’ll call them old dogs.

Anyway, the list of fools that I can’t tolerate is so long I guess I’d better stop here.  I’ve probably offended a lot of people by speaking my mind, but that’s life.  Just place me in the category of fools who don’t know when to shut up.

Until next time, muse on that.

THAT'S NOT IN THE BIBLE?

Hello people, this is Hattie Collier here, and as I have said before I’m a religious woman who gets kind of bent out of shape with all of these changes going on in the world.  I’m trying my best to adjust, but it’s not always easy.  Just the other day I read something that just about threw me for a loop.

First of all, I've been hearing and saying the words "God works in mysterious ways" since I was a little girl, and believe me that's been a while ago.  Everybody I know told me that quote came straight from the bible.  Well, you could have knocked me over with a feather when this article said that the quote comes from some poet from the 19th Century named William Cowper.  As a matter of fact his exact words were:  "God moves in a mysterious way, his wonders to perform."  Say what?

Oh, I was too through—I thought—but there was more.  You know the saying “spare the rod, spoil the child?”  That one was in there too, described as what they called one of the pseudo-verses, which in regular English means phony.  Supposedly that one comes from twisting Proverbs 13:24 which actually says: “The one who withholds the rod is one who hates his son.”  Can you believe that?  Let me tell you, if its not in there, it ought to be. I flipped through the bible for about two hours on that one looking for the book and the verse to prove the quote was in the bible.  Unfortunately,   I haven’t found it yet.  I plan on continuing my search.

Now there was one passage that Benjamin Franklin, one of the country’s founding fathers, gets credit for instead of the bible and that’s okay with me.  That saying is “God helps those that help themselves.”  I wasn’t too choked up in tossing that one aside.  I always thought of that saying as being kind of selfish and that it gives people justification to do whatever it is that they want to do, and use God and the bible in the process.

It seems that the bible and religion have been used for enough evil in the world and I found it worrisome that some of the things that I grew up believing came from the bible either didn’t or had been distorted.  With all of the mess out here in the world we need something to guide us and keep us on the straight and narrow--not that it seems to be doing any good in some cases.  Now, don’t get me wrong.  Reading about some quotes not really being in the bible is not going to stop me from reading or believing in the Word, but it makes me wonder how mistakes like these happened.

The religious scholars that were interviewed for this article gave a few reasons for all of this confusion.  Ignorance about the Word was one of them.  That came as no great surprise.  I know that I read my bible faithfully, but there are others who shall remain nameless who would turn to stone if they picked one up. You know that they say the Bible is the one best seller that’s never read.  So it would be easy to tell some folks anything when it came to what’s inside of one.  Of course, if a good Christian like me could be fooled then nobody else stands much of a chance.   Another reason given for believing these mistakes was the number of different translations of the bible.  Where the King James Version used to be the most popular, you’ve got bibles springing up all over the place nowadays.  I know I’ve lost count and every time there’s a new one released something is lost in the translation. It’s no wonder the non bible readers don’t know what’s in it or what’s not.

Another reason given was that since the monk, Martin Luther, started the Protestant revolt against the Catholic Church, phony bible verses started sprouting up like weeds.  Last, but not least one biblical expert named Craig Hazen, the director of the Christian Apologetics Program at Biola University in Southern California said that when people gather for bible studies without the guidance of an expert that “Not only do they get the interpretation wrong, but very often end up quoting verses that really aren’t there.” 

Hold it right there!  I don’t appreciate that comment one bit.  I might invite this expert to our bible study meeting.  We've got members with good reading glasses and about 100 years of testimony between us.  Now that’s expertise.   Also I’d like to know where Biola University is because I’ve never heard of it, and what in the world is an Apologetics Program?  I’d also like to suggest that he look up the word jackass. It’s in the bible, or maybe the word is jackal.  Oh well, until next week—

Muse on that.